All you need: 2P Italy and Reader: Song-Fiction:

The small trailer had little light, the only source being a dim and flickering light bulb that barely shined through the one little window, yet you could still see your face in the dirty mirror. Your skin shined and your hair was neatly combed and pinned back.  The outfit was a little skimpy for your liking, but he insisted that you wear it…and that you looked beautiful.

That’s what mattered, that he thought you looked beautiful.  You would do anything for his attention and would be quickly rewarded with the attention you yearned for. He was like that, attentive, cunning and sly, and extremely charming, and was always able to spare an extra minute for you.

You heard a knock on the trailer door.  You had been expecting him to show up.  He knew of your concerns of tonight’s performance. You were nervous.  It was your first time performing and having knifes thrown at you while a crowd cheered was extremely nerve wracking.

“Come in,” you said, quickly checking yourself in the mirror before you turned to the doorway.

The door creaked open. “Oh, please let it be him,” you thought anxiously. The figure stepped through the doorway and your heart fluttered the minute you met his shinning violet eyes.

“Feli,” you gasped in relief, as he climbed into the trailer.

He gave you a lopsided grin, and walked over to you. “Hello bella,” he purred and placed his hands on your shoulders. “You look beautiful.”

You almost reached in for a kiss, but remembered the glob of make-up you were wearing and how long it had taken it for it to look that way. Instead you smiled, “Thank you.”

“Maybe you should wear make-up more often,” he suggested, digging in his pocket for his pack of cigarettes.

Your smile wavered. “I-I can try, but this took hours….” you trailed off.  You would just have to wake up earlier, and be a bit more careful, and hopefully by the end of the day you would get your reward when you removed the make-up.

He lit the cigarette and took a puff before resting it in between his teeth, “You wanted to talk to me?”

Your face burned, a nice amount of blush already powdered on your cheeks, “I’m still kind of nervous about the performance.”

Feli chuckled and blew out a ring of smoke. He bent down so he was face to face with you and you were able to see the blue that freckled through his eyes and light sunspots on his cinnamon skin, “You’ll be fine. I would never make you do something that would hurt you.”

You nodded and looked away, instead turning your attention to the rack of sequined circus clothing. He knew you weren’t convinced.

“Do you trust me?” he asked, cupping your chin in his hand.

You met his eyes for a moment, “Since the day I met you,” you whispered.

For a moment his smirk faltered and you could feel his hand shake.  “You shouldn’t have any doubt then; right bella?”

You nodded and smiled, your nerves had calmed a bit and you were now able to enjoy his gentle touch that warmed your skin.  “I love you,” you said and met his eyes and waited for his response.

His smirk wavered and you could see almost amusement in his eyes.  He put out the cigarette in the nearby ash tray that you kept in your trailer for him and he gave a weak chuckle, “I know bella….I know…” he sighed before leaving.
The door creaked closed and your lip began to quiver, tears burned your eye, but you held them back because of the mascara.  There was no amount of makeup that could hide your red and puffy eyes.

“I love you,” you whispered again and waited for the ache in your heart to dull. You had never heard him return it, though you spent hours at night searching in your memories for that one time he could’ve even uttered it.  You ended with nothing.

“I love you,” you said a bit louder, tears almost about to spill; you let out a small sob. If you said it one more time you could at least think of it as him saying it to you.

You got off your chair and went over to the small bed in the corner, a silky robe laying on it. You changed out of your outfit and wrapped it around you.  It smelled like hay and tobacco, but there was that slight hint of cinnamon and basil, making it almost obvious that it was a gift from Feli.

You sat on the bed, but didn’t lie down, instead you leaned against the trailers metal walls and hugged your legs to your chest. You slowly closed your eyes and prayed a tear wouldn’t slip down, desperately trying to remember every detail about your time with Feli, searching in vain for at least one time he said “I love you”. The hours quickly passed and you had relived most of your time in the circus, which was mostly spent with Feli.

Most times you found that he showed you he loved you instead of saying it, sneaking a kiss here and there, gentle and sometimes rough touches, tending to your wounds when you messed up in an act and the ring-master decided to beat the mistake out of you.  He would even sneak you food when you were locked up in your trailer as punishment. It gave you more reason to worry about that night’s performance.  If you messed up you would be covered in bruises and starved for a week.

You didn’t care; he was all you needed.